Kilsauce recieves a penicillin Cumshot

 August 14th, 2008

I like porn…. No no I love porn. But no one loves porn as much as Kilsauce. When Kilsauce interviewed with a very clandestine government agency for a summer internship, he was asked a battery of personal and revealing questions. Questions such as “ Have you ever stolen anything?” to “When was the last time you received a parking ticket?”.  After an excruciating long interview process they follow it up with a polygraph test to make sure you haven’t lied about anything.

Kilsauce racked his huge brain prior to the interview to make sure he wouldn’t be blind sided by any unusual questions. Well, there was one question he wasn’t prepared to answer. It went something like this…

Interviewer: Okay Mr. Kilsauce, Do you watch and or own any pornography?

Kilsauce: Uhhh… yeah…

Interviewer: Okay how often do you watch pornography and how much do you own?

Kilsauce: Uhhhh…. Everyday…. I own a 250GB hard drive..

Interviewer: Oh well how much….

Kilsauce: Yeah it’s full.

They stare at each other blankly and in silence for about 5 seconds as if the interviewer is waiting for the punch line.

Interviewer: I’ve never heard that before, I appreciate your candor.

A very uncomfortable situation, but Kilsauce got the summer internship. In spite of having a great opportunity to work at his dream job he decided that he was too young and needed to experience life so he joined the army to attempt the humbling feat of becoming a Special Forces soldier. But I digress.

How does one receive a penicillin cumshot? Well join the Army and you may find out. When I was at 30th AG I was forced to get a number of shots. Afterward I was left with a sore arm, ass and ego. I was certain that my sleight was wiped clean from every cock smoking whore I had fornicated with in the past. 

Kilsauce really got the short end of the stick. The needle was about 8 inches long and could puncture steel. The private first class that administered his injection wasn't a day over 18 years old. His greasy acne covered face spat forth an uneducated southern twang that made Billy Ray Cyrus sound like Albert Einstein.
Kilsauce stepped behind the curtain and reluctantly dropped his shorts noting the grime under the medics fingernails.



Medic: Don't Wurrie this'll only pinch fur a second....


Kilsauce took a deep breath and braced for a 8 inch beveled needle to enter his ass. The pain shot through his entire body. The needle felt like it was filled with cement rather than antibiotics. Kilsauce began to feel a sense of relief , the worst was over , that's when he felt a slimy liquid creeping down his butt cheeks.


Kilsauce: Ahh..what's going on man?

Medic: Sorry man, I dun broke the needle off in yur ass.. Haha... Hold on I get anuther one.

Kilsauce: WHAT? No fucking way.... Are you retarded? That fucking hurt enough and you didn't even give me the shot... I look like Audrey Bitoni post coitus .

Realizing that this was in fact the United States Army and that he had no choice in the matter regardless of rank. Kilsauce sucked it up and received his penicillin shot.  For the rest of the day he walked around with a crusty white substance covering the ass of his shorts. Kilsauce loved seeing cumshots onscreen, but when it was flipped on its ear and he finally got his come-up-ins as it were, it tramatized him. He claims that he gags everytime he sees a dude let loose on screen now.  As boring as this sounds, this was just the tip of the iceberg when it came the abuse Kilsauce received at 30th AG.

(note: 30th AG is the place where soldiers go to in process into the Army. It is supposed to last 3-5 days, but just like everything in the Army it took three times as long. Your days are essentially filled by standing in never ending lines to receive medical screenings, equipment, ID cards etc.)